In your house I long to be, room by room patiently

I managed to miss the 6-month anniversary of my moving to Portland, which was two days ago.  Time has moved so quickly.

I can barely remember the me who was broken-hearted at the end of 2010 when my marriage ended.

I can barely remember the me who gave herself a year to grieve that broken heart.

I know those women were sad and lonely and feeling lost. I also know those women felt a spark of power come to life as time passed and grief passed more into the shadows.

The woman I am today began to come to life sometime in late 2011.  By the time I came to Portland last June, I was a bright bud.  In the time since then, I have begun to blossom in ways the broken-hearted me of 2010 could not possibly have imagined.

I'm learning to shine brightly, against all the programming of all my life that has taught me that I'm only safe when I'm hidden.

A lot of that shine has come out of hiding because of Jay's deep love for and unstinting support of me.  I started down this path on my own, but the relationship we are building together every day gives me the strength and inspiration to be more than I've ever been, more than I ever thought I could be.

So happy anniversary to me.  And all my thanks to Portland for being such a wonderful place to live, and my deepest gratitude to Jay for being in my life.